Tell Them...

I once took a speech class in college and the professor said one thing over and over that eventually made me want to kill myself and throw up simultaneously.

"Tell them what you're gonna tell them, Tell them, Tell them what you told them"

So in honor of that, I give you my outline for this blog.
1. Paying Attention
2. Star Sighting
3. P.D.A.


1. I started classes again Monday. I am taking a 5 week intensive, Hebrew Prophets. If any of you read this with sort of consistency (or talk to me on a regular basis) you know that I have been doing a bit of traveling/sitting around recently. I have mostly been filling my time with a whole lot of Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She really knows how to take care of business. Anyway, when I attended my first class of the summer quarter, I forgot how to pay attention. This is not to say that the Professor is boring, (although he could stand to look more like Sarah Michelle Gellar) but he sure was not killing vampires. Here's the thing, he spent 3 hours talking about the the theology of Joshua and Judges. It's like he doesn't want me to pay attention.

Interesting? Yes. But, he totally jumped over all the sweet battles, Prostitutes getting chopped up, dudes ripping off a jawbone of a lion and then beating the lion with it. This stuff is gold.


2. This morning, July 28, 2010. I saw Bradley Whitford! You may remember him from such shows as The West Wing and Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. I can legitimately say I was star struck. I love this dude. I think he is hilarious and handsome (Yes, I said it.) My love for him is only trumped by one man, Tom Hanks. He will forever be number 1. And if I saw him on the street, let it be known I would urinate my pants.

3. Finally, a quick discussion on P.D.A.. Maybe it was was my southern conservative up-bringing. Or maybe it is my aversion to physical touch in general, but public displays of affection make my stomach turn. To be clear, I'm not talking about a quick kiss or hand holding. That I'm okay with and even encourage. But, when I am sitting in Starbucks working on a paper and glance outside to see a guys hand down the back of a girls pants, it kinda makes me want to poke out my own eyes with my ice coffee straw.

Well, I told you about:
1. Paying Attention
2. Star Sighting
3. P.D.A.

I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did, or at least as much as the Starbucks couple.

Summer: Friend or Foe?

Summer. What is it? When I was a kid. Summer was a coveted time. Countdowns started the first day of school. It meant complete and total freedom from teachers and their dirty looks. Summer was hot, which meant serious pool/beach time. Spending the night at friends houses. Staying up late. Summertime romances. Vacations and most importantly...NO SCHOOL!!

And then, You would return to school, put on that leather jacket with T-birds on the back. Realize that your summer romance moved to your school and then you sing in unison with your fellow T-birds. At the same time this girl and her new friends are singing the same song but the lamer, more love filled version of the same song. We'll call this song "Summer Lovin"

Fine, thats Grease, but if my life looked more like John Travolta's, it wouldn't be the worst thing.

But now I find myself in this weird, hybrid adult-college world, aka: "College 2: Prolonged Adolescence" I don't have a summer. Technically, by the definition I gave above I haven't had a summer in quite some time.

I remember being in college and talking to an admissions woman who, I think generally hated her life, said to me, "Summer really just becomes the 'hot time' of the year" That immediately depressed me. (And that women satisfied her need to kill the spirit of Bible College students) I now know what she meant. Summer is actually a gigantic tease. It plays with you, it seduces us with its sun and warm temperatures, but really its just hot and you sweat in uncomfortable places.

I try and best summer by wearing less clothing or "breathable" clothing. This never works and you are reminded why mesh is strictly a transvestite statement. Fashion for summer is also a tease, who doesn't want to wear tank tops and linen pants? Boy I do! But, they fail to mention, that unless you look like Matthew McConaughey you should just wear a T-shirt. Probably a Parka.

But, here is my real problem, I miss what summer used to mean. Movies capture this well, the perfect summer experience. Fun adventures, great conversations and best of all, little to no sweat, depending on the situation. (if your looking for buried treasure, a little sweat is expected even desired)

So here it is, in conclusion, Summer is the popular girl in high school. Once you leave high school she becomes unimpressive and you have moved on to more stimulating things. I prefer Fall. I would like to propose that fall is the most intellectual of seasons. Fall is the girl who awkwardly read Jane Austin in the corner but, comes into her own in college when personalities become more important for guys.

And with a solid dose of chauvinism, I bid you adieu.

Johnsons vs. SoCal

Well, here it goes. My fingers are unfamiliar with this territory...this blogging.

It has been to long. I've missed you. In case you forgot what I look like or who I am, here are the important facts;

6'2''

Brown hair/eyes

Hilarious Wit

Charming

Stunning Good looks, often likened to the love child of George Clooney and Brad Pitt.

Here's a pic...

Ok, my life recently has been spent in motion. I have been dancing, flying, driving, running, rollercoasting, zooing and eating.

A lot of eating.

My family was here in L.A. for the last 10 days and let me tell ya, we Johnson's can vacation. I'm not talking lounging by the pool with a trashy novel and going in and out of a R.E.M. cycle vacationing. I'm talking putting about 400 miles on my car and seeing quite possibly every corner of Southern California. We went to Disneyland, San Diego Zoo and everything in between.

The members in attendance for this trip were Dad, Mom, Michelle and the ever hilarious Johnathan. Johnathan at one point as the tour guide, pointing out important details like Porn billboards and Taco Bells says, "It's getting hot in here, take off your clothes." As an older brother I could not have been prouder of him referencing Nelly so casually.

My job is complete.

I wish I had pictures for you all (soon to come), because there are some gems. My Dad looks high (like on pot or the crack), Mom jumped and the kids are dang good looking.

I have more stories but, I have forgotten how to type more than this.